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The L.A. Taco Horoscope for September

Mercury. Image via NASA.

[dropcap size=big]T[/dropcap]he best news this month is that Mercury goes direct on the 5th, when you can safely repair and replace everything that broke during the retrograde. Expect crowds at the Apple Store. September sees a lot of activity in Leo for the second month in a row, benefiting the lion’s friends, and Gemini and Libra can expect serious celestial nepotism. On the 19th, a new Moon in hardworking Virgo supports side hustles and grace under pressure. Balancing Equinox forces kick off autumn on the 22nd, when the sun enters Libra. Expect chaotic energy before then - four planetary conjunctions and Leo’s showboating make for an exhausting September. A Saturn opposition at the end of the month can hamstring financial plans. Find your chill, and practice using it.

Aries (March 21 – April 20)
Side hustles thrive in September, Ram. Keep sharp and take risks. Don't let the heat trigger that temper of yours on the 5th, when your ruling planet Mars enters Leo. (This conjunction is associated with actors.) Expect extra mental energy at work this month, when Mars joins Mercury on the 16th in your professional house. You’ll be more aggressive than usual, so please don’t scare the mortals. The Equinox on the 22nd lands square in your marriage house, so forge any partnerships that enhance your brand that day. Maintain a good relationship with the unexpected; it’s in your interest this month.

Neptune. Courtesy NASA.

Taurus (April 21 – May 21)
Brace yourself, Taurus. Activity in fiery Leo could leave you drained this September, physically and otherwise. When musical Neptune joins the Moon in that sign on the 5th, a burst of creativity can leave you with a mystical hangover – the celestial equivalent of post- Burning Man traffic. A full Moon in Pisces on the 6th creates emotionally vulnerability. Take confidence in looking fantastic on the 17th, when you’re ruling planet Venus joins the Moon. On the 29th, Mercury’s ingress into Cancer restores your armor, and you’ll charge into October like the bull we know and love.

Gemini (May 22 – June 21)
To know you is to love you this September, Gemini. Your ruling planet, Mercury, hangs out in Leo’s greenroom this month bringing great vibes, and goes direct on the 5th. This could cool that overheated brain of yours. Feel smart on the 16th, when Mercury joins Mars in Leo- this conjunction gives the biggest brain boost in the zodiac. Expect to take sides that day, but if you lose your cool you’ll lose your power. The Equinox on the 22nd highlights love and creativity for Gemini. Enjoy being charming until the 29th, when your grumpy twin grabs the wheel. From then on, don’t believe everything you think.

Cancer (June 22 – July 22)
All the activity in Leo this month isn’t doing you any favors, Cancer, and you may experience cloudy thinking until the 5th, when Mercury goes direct in your house of work and health. When your ruling Moon is at its farthest point on the 13th, mommy issues manifest – you might smother others with worry, or project baby needs on your significant other. If it's the latter, go with it – could be kinky. And kinky is better than talking, which can get you into trouble on the 26th when Saturn joins the Moon in Ophiuchus. Social justice is highlighted this Equinox. Be the change you want to see in the world.

Leo (July 23 – August 22)
Admit it Lion, you’re having a good 2017. Last month you got a total solar eclipse in your personal sign, and this month the party continues. The luckiest day of the month for you is the 5th, when a trifecta of planetary motions converge in your sign: (1) Mercury goes direct, (2) Mars pays a visit, and (3) Neptune joins the Moon. Your energy on this day should not be wasted. Start a project with workhorse Mars assisting. (Music benefits from these motions more than other arts.) Avoid making enemies when Mercury joins Mars on the 16th. You are poised to benefit from the Equinox in friendly Libra on the 22nd, especially if you focus on others for a change.

This is an image of the planet Uranus taken by the spacecraft Voyager 2 in 1986. Courtesy NASA.
This is an image of the planet Uranus taken by the spacecraft Voyager 2 in 1986. Courtesy NASA.

Virgo (August 23 – September 22)
Beautiful Virgo, you may look a little puffy around the eyes this month as fiery Leo’s September domination drains you like only a fire sign can. Keep the faith on the 5th, when Mercury’s retrograde finally ends. A new Moon in your sign on the 19th encourages fresh endeavors - this is a great day to start a new workout regime. On Equinox day (September 22nd) Jupiter joins the Moon in your sign, and beauty, generosity, and overall good karma shine. On the 28th, Jupiter joins Uranus bringing unusual opportunities to Virgo, including unexpected travel.

Libra (September 23 – October 22)
Just because they call it summer water, doesn’t mean you can’t enjoy rosé this fall, Libra. Toast a much-deserved change of luck on the 5th, when Mercury goes direct in friendly Leo. Your natural dynamism serves you well this month, and a planetary conjunction (Mercury/Mars) on the 16th is a great day to apply your charms. Schedule a strategic coffee date. Venus joins the Moon on the 17th to give you all the beautiful feels –enjoy! The Equinox on the 22nd welcomes the sun into your sign, and the balance it brings should be welcome after a stormy August. Don’t let emotions drive your spending habits on the 26th, when Saturn joins the Moon in Ophiuchus.

Scorpio (October 23 – November 21)
Did festival season wear you down, Scorpio? You will feel the strain on the 5th when your ruling planet Mars enters fiery Leo in your friendship house. It’s OK to miss a party sometimes. Take care of you, and come out to play on the 16th when Mercury restores your famous willpower. You’ll come out of the fire stronger, if a little tired. Don’t expect balance on the Equinox (September 22nd). When the sun enters windy Libra, storms are on the horizon. Avoid a financial opportunity on 28th. It’s a trap.

Sagittarius (November 22 – December 21)
The Archer abides this month, Sagittarius. Channel your inner dude, slap on some Ray-Bans and let it roll. Leo’s busy month won’t burn you up like the other signs - you sunbathe naked in the fire. On the 5th, Mercury goes direct in your travel house just in time for a weekend road trip. You always weather the retrograde in style, don’t you? Keep an eye on your wallet on the 26th when your old frenemy Saturn is messing around in your money house. The Equinox on the 22nd brings harmony to parties - great day for a barbeque.

Voyager 2 Image of Saturn. Courtesy NASA.
Voyager 2 Image of Saturn. Courtesy NASA.

Capricorn (December 22 – January 20)
With all the activity in fiery LEO, Capricorns can expect a rocky September. At least Mercury goes direct on the 5th, helping with finances. You know that loan that didn’t come through in August? Try again. Don’t be thrown off balance by the Equinox in Libra – the scales may disturb the goat, but you’ll prevail. On the 26th, your ruling planet Saturn conjoins the Moon in Ophiuchus, the snake-bearer, in your community house. This is a great day for social networking, especially since this conjunction brings support to your hard work and ambition. Keep on keepin’ on, Capricorn. October is just around the corner, and it brings gifts to the goat.

Aquarius (January 21 – February 19)
Let moods pass like waves this month, Water- Bearer, as you adjust to the new normal. The ocean beneath you is deep and harmonious – feel supported. Expect mental clarity on the 5th, when Mercury goes direct. When your ruling planet Uranus joins the Moon in your income house, expect much need financial relief on the 9th. Friendly Libra hosts this month’s Equinox (September 22nd) providing balance. An opposition with Jupiter’s luck on the 28th will make you question partnerships. Ride it out – the feeling will pass.

Pisces (February 19 – March 20)
When you mess with the kitty you get the claws, Pisces, and Leo has big claws this month. Lay low, if you can, on the 5th when Mercury goes direct in Leo. Expect to get burned by a coworker. A conjunction between your ruling planet Neptune and the Moon will give you all the intuition you need that day. On the 6th self-medication becomes self-sabotage. Step away from your favorite chillaxer and distract yourself with a movie. The Equinox brings good news to your money house on the 22nd. October’s just around the corner - keep on swimming fish.

Ophiuchus (November 29 – December 17)
September brings recognition in the workplace to the Snake-Bearer. Petty squabbles distract others this month, but not you. When Mercury goes direct in your career house on the 5th, expect a promotion, or at least a cold beer. An emotional crack the whip on the 18th is the result of Mars joining the Moon in Leo. Expect more responsibility at work with the new Moon in hard-working Virgo on the 19th. Remember, it’s not bragging if you can do it, and you can. This Equinox, September 22nd, balance your ego with your curiosity. If you can manage that you’ll leave this month smelling like a rose.

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