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Horoscopes

The L.A. Taco Horoscope for August, 2018

1:13 PM PDT on July 30, 2018

    Mercury. Image via NASA.

    [dropcap size=big]L[/dropcap]os Angeles is the stuff dreams are made of, the dreams themselves, and, this month, the very path to achieve those dreams. Usually when it is this hot you should hole up in an air-conditioned room. But this month, August skies deliver an opportunity to realize your dreams, whatever they may be. So get out there. Three Planets go direct this month – leaving retrograde motion and firing up the zodiac (Uranus on the 7th, Mercury on the 18th, and Mars on the 28th.) They bring goal-achieving energy with them, manifesting a little differently in each sign. (Read below for specific indications.)

    Some Angels will remember Saturday nights at the Griffith Laserium, enjoying a Dark Side of the Moon show enhanced by pre- rave psychedelics. The Perseid light show is all we have now. The meteor shower runs this month, peaking on the 11th and 12th from a position right above Aries and Taurus. It is best appreciated away from city lights, but you may spot a couple shooting stars even in the city. And all Angels can enjoy the determination this event brings. Enjoy Leo’s New Moon, also on the 11th. It supports goal setting. What are the steps that will take you from here to where you want to be? Keep your eyes on the horizon, or just above it where Venus holds her residency as Evening Star on the 17th. This position is associated with ardent physical affection. Go get some.

    Aries (March 21 – April 20)
    Put on your head-butting shoes, Ram. Fortune favors the bold. Take a workplace gamble on the 7th when the Planet Uranus gets its act together, leaving Retrograde in your constellation. Enjoy the latitude this brings you professionally. You wanted freedom; here it is. The Persead Meteor Shower (peaking on the 11th and 12th) radiates through Aries. The Persead constellation is a neighbor to the Ram, and you can expect a burst of effortless productivity that day. You may even see a few falling stars through our light-polluted skies. (Best show is right before dawn.) On the 18th, Mercury leaves retrograde in your Career House and supports the professional ambitions of my horned brothers and sisters. August ends with Mars also leaving Retrograde (August 28th), energizing - you guessed it – your Career House. That target you set? Hit it.

    Taurus (April 21 – May 21)
    Not to gossip about the neighbors, Bull, but Perseus, killer of snaky-haired Medusa, is hosting a rager in a constellation around the corner from yours. Attendant falling stars will radiate right through your house, especially on the 11th and 12th, supercharging your already strong will. Whatever your current heart’s desire may be: new job, new love, new life, it happens in August. Love is all you need on the 17th when your ruling Planet Venus is at its brightest (or its greatest elongation for my geeky angels) illuminating your House of Love. Venus will be the brightest thing going after the Sun and the Moon. See it above the western horizon for an hour after sunset. The love keeps rolling in the next day too when Mercury leaves Retrograde in the same House (August 18th). Your bull’s heart will be full. The month ends with travel, possibly for work, when ambitious Mars leaves retrograde in your Career House on the 28th. Utilize the professional energy August brings.

    Gemini (May 22 – June 21)
    Ask a friend to hold your wallet, Twins, and do not make any financial decisions August 8th. Your ruling Mercury lands in your Personal Income Sector that day, aligning with the Earth and Sun in what the JPL kids call an inferior conjunction. The mental equivalent of dark matter may cloud your thinking. After that, August is sweet to you, Gemini. The Persead Meteor Shower radiates from your House of Karma this month (on the 11th and 12th). This is pretty rad news if you are working on your inner life. But if you are materialistic, or otherwise uptight on those days, expect a celestial slap upside the head. (You will know it when it happens.) This annual light show brings great energy to new beginnings, so channel it constructively. Mid-month, Mercury leaves Retrograde in your Home and Family Sector, so the household drama should mellow out. The month ends with another planet going Direct; hard working Mars fires up your House of Transformation August 28th, allowing for a better version of you to make an August debut.

    A color photo of Mars
    Mars. Image via NASA
    Mars. Image via NASA

    Cancer (June 22 – July 22)
    I know you are a diva, Crab, but expect even more heart-rending arias this August, especially on the 8th when Mercury occupies your constellation, aligning with the Earth and Sun. Emotions will hit the high notes. The rest of the month is all about money, and good news, too. Wait to make financial decisions until the 11th, when the New Moon encourages change. That lunar energy won’t steer you wrong. Mid-month, make time for pals when the Perseid light show radiates into your Friendship House (August 11th and 12th). Stay out late in the greatest city in America, and remember to look upstairs; some shooting stars are smog-proof, and likely you will spot one or two. On August 18th Mercury leaves Retrograde in your Personal Income House. This is awesome news for your wallet, and can translate into a better job if you have some feelers out. Mars also leaves Retrograde this month (August 28th). Martian energy supports financial partnerships, be they professional or romantic.

    Leo (July 23 – August 22)
    It’s lion season, Baby. Get ready to be the center of attention, a.k.a. your happy place. I usually don’t recommend self-absorption and drama as life strategies, but this month the Planets highly encourage such behavior among Leos. Everything happens in your sign. Feel extra fired-up when your ruling Sun occupies your House of Self August 10th, motivating you. Feel energized the next day too when the New Moon lands in Leo, supporting self-promotion. This aspect coincides with the Persead Meteor Shower (peaking on the 11th and 12th). It radiates from your Status Quadrant. Basically the zodiac is your publicist this month. Your love life picks up too – and you had better delete the pictures - when Venus brings the sexy to your constellation. (See the Evening Star herself after sunset on the 17th, low on the western horizon.) The Retrograde Mercury that’s been bugging everybody? It straightens out in your sign August 18th, granting potent mental energy to the lion. Roar smarter. This month you will be extra flashy, extra selfish, and extra successful. The wolf of Wall Street has nothing on the lion of the zodiac.

    Virgo (August 23 – September 22)
    We’re diving, Virgo. Get ready to go deep. August assigns dream work to the Virgin, with most planetary phenomena landing in your House of Subconscious, beginning with a Mercury, Earth and Sun alignment August 8th. Your mind will operate on many levels, clarifying your values and cement your chill. Fatigued from your inner work? Get your beauty sleep and hydrate. The Persead Meteors radiate from your House of Transformation (August 11th and 12th). Feel like Beyoncé after the twins with the increased glow these shooting stars bestow. On August 18th, Mercury finally leaves Retrograde (Thank Goddess), also in your House of Subconscious. Your most subtle levels of self will align to empower the Virgin. Mars leaves Retrograde too, going Direct in your Health Sector on the 28th. On that day, your inner beauty will be shine on the outside too.

    Perseid Meteor shower. Photo by Fred Bruenjes, via NASA.
    Perseid Meteor shower. Photo by Fred Bruenjes, via NASA.

    Libra (September 23 – October 22)
    Libra is living in the material world this August, and succeeding there. Luckily the scales are not easily corrupted, even when they are loaded with money. On the 11th and 12th the Perseid Meteors radiate from your Joint-Income sector. These shooting stars lend determination to new beginnings, so whatever that big idea of yours is, launch it. Do it now. Other Planets agree and are willing to help. When Mercury leaves retrograde in your Subconscious Sector (August 18th) it pulls good ideas to your mind’s surface. The path to success should be clear. Need a buddy on that path? Mars has your back on the 18th when it also leaves Retrograde in Capricorn. Mars is exalted here - it never works harder for you than in this position – and it lands in your Career House. Business may have been slow this year, but it’s about to pick up. Maximize the potential by focusing your efforts, and leaving side hustles on the side. Keep your eyes on the prize, kids.

    Scorpio (October 23 – November 21)
    The Scorpion feels Leo’s solar blessing in his Friendship House this August. The Sun lands there with a case of high vibes under each arm (August 10th) and if you are not out painting our fine town red until late that night, you have no right to call yourself a Scorpio. Don’t let us down. On the 11th, both a New Moon and meteor shower create conditions for great social networking. Keep it fun; light hearts benefit most from shooting stars. Mid-month sees more activity in your Friendship House. Mercury leaves Retrograde there on the 18th, improving your social status. Normally, we don’t trust anybody this good at schmoozing, but your enthusiasm makes us like you, and we’re a sucker for a pretty arachnid. The month ends with romance on the 28th when Mars goes Direct in your House of Love. You might just hit it off with somebody socially advantageous to you. Shameless self-promotion and social capital, what else you got in that stinger?

    Sagittarius (November 22 – December 21)
    Archer, step away from the bow; Perseus will be shooting the stars this month. The Meteor Shower radiates from your House of Health, so soak up that stellar medicine on the 11th and 12th. For best results, sleep outside and enjoy the light show. You were always spiritually inclined, but August sees increased activity in your House of Higher Law: in fact, the Sun and Venus also make appearances there. (The Sun fires it up on the 10th, exciting your moral compass.) The New Moon lands in the same location on the 11th. New Moons mean new beginnings, and you will know what to do on the 18th when Mercury leaves Retrograde, bestowing mental clarity. Go deep, Re-brand. Heck, start a cult. I hear there’s money it. Mars works hard for your money when it goes direct in your Personal Income House on the 21st. This is probably one of your best money days for 2018; so don’t let it slide by. Take some me-time on the 28st. It is always best to lie low when Saturn aligns with the Moon in your sign. An overly serious mood can land you in wet blanket territory. Of course in this heat, a wet blanket doesn’t sound so bad.

    Venus - Computer Simulated Global View. Via NASA.
    Venus - Computer Simulated Global View. Via NASA.

    Capricorn (December 22 – January 20)
    We are reminded why they call you the goat this month, Capricorn; August certainly spices up your nights. The Sun brings fire to your House of Sex and Transformation August10th. Carnal energy is heightened by the Persead Meteors radiating from your House of Love (August 11th and 12th), so expect an increase to your already dangerous charms. Other signs beware. Seductive Venus also visits your House of Love on August 17th). To fully activate the sensual boost this affords, look at Venus yourself an hour after sunset, just above the western horizon (August 18th). Seeing it in person is the cosmic equivalent of a ginger -cayenne wellness shot. Your libido is further enhanced on the 18th when Mercury goes Direct in the same house. The month ends with Mars leaving Retrograde in your sign on the 28th, encouraging over-confidence. You are a little sleazy this August, Capricorn. Own it.

    Aquarius (January 21 – February 19)
    Here is your chance to create a stronger home and family life, Water- Bearer. Don’t fuck it up. The month begins with your ruling Planet Uranus leaving Retrograde in your Domestic House (August 7th). Expect increased freedom and courage with this classically positive aspect. Home and family get more celestial love on the 11th and 12th, when the Perseid Meteor Shower radiates from this same sector. New roots are strengthened. Mercury leaves Retrograde and supports partnerships on the 18th. The Full Moon lands in your sign (August 28th) but don’t get carried away with reflection. Some Aquarians are so independent that they miss out on life’s fruit. Try for freedom from old patterns. The Month ends with Mars going direct in your House of Subconscious. Whatever self-destructive behavior tempts you that day, resist it. Let that Martian energy work for you – it has best interest in mind, and a beautiful life is at hand.

    Pisces (February 19 – March 20)
    Calling all fishes. August demands that you share your charms this month, Pisces. So shake yourself of daydreams and share yourself with this town. The Persead Meteors radiate from your House of Community, peaking on the 11th and 12th, so go shine your light at a block- party or outdoor concert. Retrograde Mercury ends on the 18th. It goes direct in your marriage house, bringing an awesome attitude to all parties. You work best in a team – your constellation is made from two fishes after all - so whether your marriage is symbolic: say, with a business partner or traditional and filed with the county, pair up. Make your life a buddy movie. Pet projects are supported on the 28th by an exalted Mars. That Planet leaves Retrograde in your House of Community as well. This Martian energy supports professional ambition. It turns out you can have make money having fun. But get on it. The best dreams are the ones you act on.

    Ophiuchus (November 29 – December 17)
    ‘Great at holding snakes,’ begins your LinkedIn profile. You have unusual job skills, Ophiuchus, and August highlights your professional status. The sun brings solar energy to your Career house on the 10th, increasing your workplace mojo. And a New Moon supports new endeavors in the same House August 11th. Want more career bonuses? Mercury goes direct (also in your Career House) August 18th, smoothing out any job frustrations that have been bothering you lately. Strong partnership helps your hustle, and the Persead Meteors shower your Partnership House on the 11th and 12th. To soak up the planetary medicine, sleep out. Maybe camp under darker skies to see it better. This is our best light show of the summer. The month ends with Mars leaving Retrograde and supporting your home and family life. Enjoy the sweetness of it.

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